Say My Name - Say My Name

I’ve been on this online dating service for a few months now. I wanted to talk about a trend I’ve started to notice – terrible screen names.

First impressions are key when meeting new people, we all know this. In the online dating world the profile you build is your first impression to everyone that views it. You have complete control over what your profile says, so it should be relatively easy to form a good first impression. Out in the “wild” approaching someone in a bar, there are so many other circumstances that could affect the first impression you make.

When I receive an email or any sort of contact from a guy online there are two things that I immediately look for and take note of: the person’s screen name (SN) and his picture. If I don’t find the person attractive then of course I lose interest right away. The SN is the other important part of the first impression that will decide if I move forward with this guy. Keep in mind this all happens before I’ve even set eyes on his profile.

Read this next part carefully:

DON’T MAKE STRANGE SCREEN NAMES!

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve received an email from a guy with a horrible SN. Even if I find you attractive the SN can be a huge turn off. A few good rules to follow:

· Don’t use an inside joke or nickname that can be misinterpreted by people who don’t know you.
· If you wouldn’t want to be called that in real life…not a good choice.
· Don’t try to be overly romantic or sensitive.
· Your real name is just fine…it’s ok to use it in your SN
· You have an entire profile to showcase you personality traits….don’t try to cram it into your SN

Let me pay homage to some of the gems I’ve come across:

MomsayImaKeeper…… Well, two things. How many moms have told you this and why are you no longer with their sons?

HotNJhunk…. I looked at this quickly and read, Hot ‘N’ Junk.

Lotsoflovingtogive….. Been that long huh?

Dark_irony…. I want this in a soap opera not a date.

NYGiantSac…. This one left me speechless.

Oneromanticlover…. Likes holding hands and walks on the beach

Playful30….. In his picture he’s wearing a suit and a tie and not smiling….maybe contact Dark_Irony?

Sweetcutesoul….call me jaded but, ugh

Transcendent09… Post op transcendent that is

Wetlikesweat… just EWWW!

TrustFundMaybe… ummm prenup definitely?

Meeting new people is all about snap judgments, especially online where it is much less personal and way easier to dismiss someone without a second thought.

In a previous posting I pointed out some parallels between dating and a free market. Well, going down a similar road, creating a profile on a dating site is advertising. I think people try too hard to be funny or creative with their SN to grab attention. This is advertising but you don’t need to be flashy or unique with an SN.

For me your SN isn’t really going to have a big impact unless it’s a negative one. If you have a simple SN then your picture and profile will do the talking. If you have something ridiculous, of course people are going to notice and it may not get the reaction you had intended.